If Only I’d Been Available

I sit on the house deck this morning, enjoying my cup of coffee. I wonder about the week that has been, and pondered on the realization that not all the time, glorious moments like this exist. Not all people are blessed to sit outside, soaking in the early morning sun. I may be a stay-at-home gal, but a lot of things keep occupying my mind. My online job. The org site I’m currently maintaining. What story to write next. Will I still be feeling healthy tomorrow. These are quite a few things but when I come to think of it, each one of them requires my undivided attention.

Thinking about these things and bringing them into execution causes my life to somehow get bleak and full of exhaustion. I know worrying about them, among other things will just tire me more, but I can’t help it. There were times when I would just want to pray them and leave them all in the hands of the Almighty. But then I just feel too tired at night to even ask for His grace while I sleep.

And what a shameful Christian I am, to be too tired to pray?

Today, as I hear the gospel, I think it through. I have all the time in the world, actually. If only I’d been more available to talk to God and ask Him for help, then maybe I won’t feel so tired at all. If only I’d made myself free from worry and instead spend time listening to Him, then my life would somehow change – from its spiritual bleakness to a life full of blessings. Well, I always feel blessed, but then it’s hard to appreciate the things you have when all you want to do is hit the sack, right?

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From today's gospel.

Take time to pray. Be available to God, and embrace the change He does to your life.

Have a blessed Sunday.

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