During the troubled times, I sincerely believe that prayers can do wonders. I remember when I had a respiratory failure in 2013 and barely thought I’d survive, when I learned that a lot of people were praying for me, it made me more determined to fight and survive. It is something that never really fails, especially when done with utmost sincerity and so much faith.
Right now, I am days to go to the operating room. And as much as I want to compose myself that everything’s gonna be alright, of course, I can’t deny the horrors of the thought of knives and stitches over me. I went through confession the other day which helped me ease up (and it set me free, too, of all the pain and grudges I have deep within me), and I’ve been praying that all will be well. But I am writing this, because the truth is, I am still scared. I know I shouldn’t be, as words of God alone should be my ultimate source of comfort. And I just can’t understand the source of my fear. Am I scared of unsuccessful surgery? Am I scared of not being okay? Am I scared of my physical state, if I really can undergo surgery once I’m already at the hospital. Or maybe I am just scared of the unknown during my perioperative period.
So please, I need your help. Please pray for me – for my fears to subside, and for strength. I was never used to asking for help, but I figured it wouldn’t be so bad.
Thank you so much. And once I’m back on track, I’ll tell the tale. I want my experiences to count, especially for those myasthenia gravis fighters just like me. Again, thank you. Till my next post. 🙂